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We know that grief and joy can coexist after loss, but sometimes, we are forced into that space far quicker than anyone would have expected. Today’s guest, Megan Hillukka, was 36 weeks pregnant with her fourth child when her third passed away at just 15 months old. She is joining us to share her story of loss and finding peace after processing grief. During this episode, you will hear how Megan navigated never finding the answers to why her child passed away, how her first-hand experience of grief taught her that the process is not linear, and how she works through the felt experience of grief in the body. Hear about her work with moms, helping them to peel back the layers of loss and approach feelings of guilt with the knowledge that each step can be revisited whenever needed. We touch on comparison and how each path is unique, as well as talking through Megan’s work coaching other parents through their difficult experiences. Megan offers a membership where parents get access to powerful support and tools to help them walk through their journey of grief. Hear all about what her compassionate offering, and plenty of pearls of wisdom from her story today.

Key Points From This Episode:

  • An introduction to today’s guest, grief coach Megan Hillukka, and her story of loss.
  • Her story of grief and loss, having lost her 15 month old daughter due to sudden and unexplained reasons.
  • Finding words to shape her experience as ‘trauma’.
  • The challenge of never having an answer for why she had lost her child.
  • Why Megan feels content with not knowing why Aria passed away after processing her grief.
  • The nature of grief which is not linear.
  • How she has chosen to process guilt in her body.
  • Megan’s relationship with guilt and grief and how she has learned to move beyond grief.
  • The work she does with moms to help them to unpack and process the layers of loss.
  • Dealing with guilt as parents who’ve experienced loss.
  • Learning that you can revisit steps of the grief process if you need to.
  • Allowing the complex mixture of emotions surrounding grief to coexist.
  • The challenge of grieving Aria while nursing a newborn.
  • Why every path after loss is challenging, regardless of the circumstances.
  • How comparison creates disconnection.
  • Megan’s work coaching other parents through their difficult experiences.
  • Her services which include tapping meditations specific to child loss, emotion meditations to connect to the physical experience, and more.
  • Managing unnecessary thoughts that create additional suffering.
  • Distinguishing between clean grief and dirty grief.
  • What is included in Megan’s online membership; tapping meditations, breathwork, live calls and more.
  • Where to find Megan Hillukka online.


“I don’t have to know why. I just believe it was her time to go. This is just my own personal belief and that her life was complete. Her life wasn’t cut short in the way that we think as humans.” — Megan Hillukka [0:11:28]

“Grief is not linear, but also, I am where I am because of the work, and effort and time I’ve put into my grief, and healing and processing my emotions.” — Megan Hillukka [0:13:04]

“I’ve processed that guilt in my body so much. I’ve felt it and I’ve felt it with compassion, and empathy and love at the same time. I’ve learned that it’s okay for me to put that guilt down.” — [0:23:41]

“You were just feeling happy, and all of a sudden, you’re bawling your eyes out, and you’re like, “I was just happy, what’s going on?” That’s the nature of grief. It’s when you can allow all of that to just be what it is, is when grief can get so much lighter.” — Megan Hillukka [0:18:45]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Megan Hillukka

Megan Hillukka on Instagram

Megan Hillukka on Pinterest

Grieving Moms Podcast